My Brother Mike passed away today – 1st Nov 2024 …

 It was a terrible time today my wonderful funny and caring brother Mike passed away in hospital . He had MS for years and a lot of time thankfully at the beginning he was what is called in remission.

it was so distressing to see how he ended up it really was.
We were really close especially later on it life , close in the way that we were friends as well as brothers. Of course there were times when we were children we didn't always get on and fought like brothers do. Besides I was a bit argumentative as a child , he was older than me (only by 5 years) but where I was highly strung and argumentative he was totally the opposite. I dont really remember seeing him ever get fazed about anything much he was a very placid person. even when he was diagnosed with MS he didnt really get emotional about it , it was almost like he took everything in his stride, he was so laid back and chilled person I was and am to a certain extent even now I am older still pretty much the same letting things worry me even the smallest things. – he handled his MS over the years much better than I could have done if that was me being diagnosed with it and having to deal with it.

Nonetheless even though we fought and argued as we were growing up like most brothers do we shared the same similar love of good music and good bands . I feel he got me interested especially in Pink Floyd and Supertramp and Kate Bush amongst other music artists . He was very proud of his expensive ‘music centre’ and record collection. There would be times he would go here Andyboy sit there and listen to this see what you reckon? – and it would be Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon, or a Supertramp album – then consequently I would go out and buy the albums for myself. without him playing the albums to me I cannot see me taking the leap and getting into their music and still being a fan of them to this day.

When I left school i had a job at an engineering firm which I couldnt stand and he knew a manager of a tyre and exhaust place and got me a job there I stayed there for a while but then eventually I wanted a change and then he got me a job where he worked at a car spare parts place in Luton called GKN Autoparts as a stores person , then when i passed my driving test he pushed me towards driving the vans to delivering the car parts to garages and shops in the area. one day i went out delivering some parts and accidently backed into a pole and damaged the rear of the company van. I told him and he said that he would take the blame because I hadn't been there long if he said he took the van out and had an accident there would be less consequences because he had been working there for years. so he really had my back as you can see. really I only realise this as I have got older how many times he really did look out for me in the past always looking after me.

in the late 80’s I met an Irish girl (Val now my wife since 1990) from Hemel Hempstead and her parent wanted to move back to Ireland but her mum and dad had various illnesses and Val wanted to move to Ireland to be near them as they retired. And me going to Ireland a couple of times fell in love with the place and the pace of life compared to the UK.
I had to make the hard decision to leave my family in the UK, my mum, my dad, my brother, my sister and start up a new life in Ireland and try and start up my own business which I always wanted to do (something I would never have been able to do in the UK) – so the hard part came tell my family, and especially Mike found it difficult, “I’m really going to miss you Andyboy” he would say. We would phone each other when we could but really the introduction of the Internet and SKYPE was a game changer. when we used to SKYPE each other regularly he would be listening to some music on some 70’s/80’s music channel and a song would come on and he would go “here Andyboy, remember this one?” and we would be sat there talking (and viewing eachother) on SKYPE listening to the music and talking about it , quite comical really.

Throughout the years me and Val would go over to UK to visit my family and our friends and Mike came over to Ireland a couple of times and he really enjoyed his stay and said what a beautiful area was where we live and he would say he really really missed us when we left , but that he could see we made the right decision.

Come to present day and got the upsetting news that Mike was admitted into Luton & Dunstable hospital and gravely ill so we got a flight and rushed over to be with him.

It was so sad and upsetting to see Mike lying there in the bed he looked peaceful but he was heavily sedated with morphine and other painkillers.
Unfortunate the next day he deteriorated more and we was all around his bed (me val, his partner, and his daughter and son and my 95 year old dad / mikes dad ) and then the machine beeped to say his pain medication ran out.

we were told to leave while the nurses made him more comfortable and replaced his meds. so we all had to wait out in the corridor of the ward whilst they did that with nurses and patients all walking past us then we went back into mike and he slowly took his last breath and passed away bless him it was so upsetting but again the nurses came in and asked to go outside and wait in the corridor no relatives room to wait in or anything – it was so poor and undignified with people and patients all walking past us and talking to each other just when my poor brother had just passed away.

I felt so sorry for my dad he was just so upset and devastated, as was of course Jenny & Chris, Mikes children and his partner Sally, its only consolation that he passed away peacefully in the end and was out of any pain.

I still think of Mike (or Mickeyboy or Bro as I used to call him) and the fun times we used to have and look back on how he looked after me and guided me as I was growing up , and when we weren’t quarrelling the laughs we got winding up my mum by throwing tea bags at the kitchen door (that’s a story for another day) or reminiscing about the past and where we lived which we always did when we SKYPE’d each other and remember those times fondly.
Really miss you Mickeyboy , hope they are playing some good golden oldie tunes where you are now mate!.

Me and mike in 1988 at his home in Luton.